Bride dances with her father at The Bell Tower on 34th in Houston, Texas.

Your wedding day is full of special moments, but few are as heartwarming as the parent dances.

Whether you're swaying to a classic tune or busting a move to a modern hit, these dances are a beautiful way to honor the love and support of your parents. Let's dive into everything you need to know to make these dances truly unforgettable.

THE IMPORTANCE OF COMMUNICATION

 Before diving into song selection or dance lessons, it's important to have open and honest conversations with the parents involved in these dances. Typically, this includes the father of the bride and the mother of the groom, but modern weddings often adapt to different family structures.

Start by discussing the idea of parent dances with both parents. Some may be excited about the prospect, while others might feel nervous or unsure. Address any concerns they might have early on. Here are some key points to discuss:

-Their comfort level with dancing in front of an audience

-Any physical limitations that might affect their ability to dance

-Their preferences for song genre or style

-Whether they'd like to choose the song or leave it up to you

-If they'd like to take dance lessons or keep it simple and spontaneous

Ultimately, the goal is to create a special moment that everyone feels comfortable with. Involving parents in the planning process will help make that possible.

SELECTING THE RIGHT SONGS

Choosing the right songs for your parent dance is the most important part of planning this portion of your wedding. Here are some tips to help you make the best selection:

Consider the Message

Look for songs that reflect your relationship with your parent. It could be a song about growing up, parental love, or a tune that holds special meaning for you both.

Think about the Mood

Do you want something upbeat and fun, or more emotional and sentimental?

Keep it Danceable

Choose a song with a tempo that's easy to dance to, especially if your parents aren't experienced dancers.

Watch the Length

Aim for songs around two to three minutes long. If your chosen song is longer, consider having your DJ fade it out at an appropriate point.

Be Mindful of Lyrics

Make sure the lyrics are appropriate for the occasion and don't contain any potentially embarrassing content.

Some popular choices for parent dances include "My Girl" by The Temptations, "What a Wonderful World" by Louis Armstrong,” “You Are the Sunshine of My Life,” by Stevie Wonder, and "Wind Beneath My Wings" by Bette Midler.

But don't be afraid to think outside the box and choose something that truly resonates with you and your parent.

Scheduling the Dances

The timing of your parent dances can significantly impact the flow of your reception. Here are some options to consider:

-Immediately after the first dance: This is a traditional approach that keeps all the special dances together at the beginning of the reception. 

-Before dinner: Having the dances before the meal allows you to transition smoothly into dinner afterwards.

After dinner: This option gives guests time to settle in and can help build anticipation for the dances.

Discuss the timing with your wedding planner or DJ to see how it best fits into your overall reception timeline. Remember to consider your parents' preferences as well: Some might prefer to dance early in the reception, while others might want more time to prepare.

PARENT DANCE ETIQUETTE

While there are no strict rules for parent dances, here are some etiquette guidelines to keep in mind:

-Order of dances: Traditionally, the bride dances with her father first, followed by the groom dancing with his mother. However, you can adjust this order based on your preferences and family dynamics.

-Including step-parents: If step-parents are involved, consider how to include them. You might, for example, choose to make a point of dancing with them, too.

-Honoring absent parents: If a parent has passed away or can't attend, consider a moment of remembrance or a special tribute in lieu of the dance.

-Inviting others to join: Some couples choose to invite all parents and children to join them on the dance floor halfway through the song, creating a more inclusive moment.

CAPTURING THE MOMENT: PHOTOGRAPHY TIPS

Your parent dances are moments you'll want to remember forever. Here are some tips for getting the best photographs:

 

-Brief your photographer: Discuss the parent dances with your photographer in advance. Let them know when the dances will occur and any special moments you want captured.

 

-Consider the lighting: Make sure the dance floor is well-lit. If possible, have your DJ or venue coordinator adjust the lighting to create a warm, flattering ambiance.

 

-Capture reactions: Ask your photographer to capture not just the dance itself, but also the reactions of your spouse, other family members, and guests.

 

-Get close-ups and wide shots: A mix of intimate close-ups and wider shots that capture the whole scene will give you a comprehensive record of the moment.

 

-Consider a videographer: While photos are wonderful, a video can capture the movement, music, and emotions of the dance in a unique way.

 

MAKING THE MOST OF THE MOMENT

 

Your parent dance is more than just a tradition, it’s an opportunity to express gratitude, love, and the unique bond you share with your parents.

 

Here are some ways to make the most of this special moment:

 

-Practice, but don't over-rehearse: A little preparation can boost confidence, but don't aim for perfection. The authenticity of the moment is what makes it special.

 

-Consider adding a personal touch: Some couples choose to share a few words with their parent before or during the dance or present them with a small gift.

 

-Embrace emotions: It's okay to laugh, cry, or just smile. These genuine emotions will make your photos and memories even more precious.

 

ADDITIONAL CONSIDERATIONS

-Dance lessons: If you or your parents are nervous about dancing, consider taking a few lessons together. This can be a fun bonding experience and boost everyone's confidence.

-Shoes: Make sure you and your parents wear comfortable shoes for the dance. Consider having a change of shoes available if needed.

-Alternatives to dancing: If a parent is unable to dance due to health issues, consider alternatives like a special toast or a seated "dance" where you can still share a moment together.

-Cultural traditions: If you're incorporating cultural elements into your wedding, research how parent dances are traditionally handled in your culture and consider ways to honor these traditions.

We encourage you and your parents to focus being fully present during your dances and enjoying them. And don’t worry about your dance steps or the audience. What matters most is the love and appreciation you're expressing.

The Bell Tower on 34th, one of the leading wedding venues in Houston, is known for our beautiful grounds, full planning services, and talented chef.

Our venue serves couples throughout southeast Texas.

Learn more about holding a wedding here.

The Bell Tower on 34th

901 W 34th St, Houston, TX 77018

(713) 868-2355