One of the biggest favors you can do for yourselves if you and your partner are planning a large wedding is to have a wedding ceremony rehearsal.
This run-through of your ceremony is a valuable safeguard, a way to ensure that everything comes together the way you want it to.
But, since you can’t have a ceremony rehearsal without including the participants, it’s important to consider their needs and feelings as much as possible. That’s where etiquette — a way to show others that you respect and appreciate them — comes into the picture.
Below, you’ll find tips for having a rehearsal that’s not only helpful for you, but also a pleasant experience for the people who join you.
Identify the Participants
The key people you’ll want at the ceremony rehearsal, in addition to you and your partner, are your parents, the officiant, and, ideally, as many members of the wedding party as possible. If you’re planning to include children in the ceremony, they should be present as well. Additional participants could include ushers, people who will be doing a reading or performing
Communicate Clearly
Once you’ve identified the people you’d like at the rehearsal, ask them to attend as early as possible so they can make the necessary plans. In the case of your flower girl or ring bearer, you’ll need to ask their parents if at least one of them can attend as well.
Make a point of providing all of the participants with details about the day, time, location, parking, where they should enter the rehearsal location, dress code, and anything else that could be helpful. As the rehearsal approaches, send reminders with the day, time, and location.
Be Child-Friendly
If you are expecting children at your rehearsal, talk with their parents about arranging a timeline that factors in their usual mealtime and bedtime as much as possible.
Try to get the rehearsal started on time and moving along promptly. (All of the participants will appreciate that.) Keep your instructions for the participating children short and to the point.
Give them a chance to do more than one run-through if you think it will be helpful.
Make the Participants Comfortable
Start the rehearsal with brief introductions — This may be some of your participants’ first opportunities to meet.
Cover the Details
The person coordinating the rehearsal should make sure everyone knows where and when they’ll be gathering before the actual ceremony begins, who will be paired with who, the order they’ll be in, when to enter, when music or readings begin, and where they should be standing or sitting. The rehearsal is a great time to give ushers their instructions, as well.
Stick with the Essentials
Remember that a rehearsal is not the time to practice your wedding toast or plan out special surprises. Keep the focus on the main event — getting everyone ready for the big day — and don’t keep participants at the rehearsal longer than necessary.
Provide Rehearsal Dinner Details
Whether you’re having your rehearsal dinner at the same place as the rehearsal or somewhere else, make sure your participants know where and when it will be and about any dress guidelines they should be aware of. Make sure you touch base far in advance to ask about allergies and food preferences.
Harness Technology
In today's digital age, consider utilizing video conferencing for participants who cannot attend in person. This can be particularly helpful for those who live far away or have other commitments.
Emergency Plan
Discuss a backup plan for unforeseen circumstances, such as bad weather if your ceremony is outdoors.
Having a plan in place reduces stress on the actual wedding day.
Comfort for Elderly Participants
If you have elderly participants, consider their comfort during the rehearsal.
Provide seating if needed, and make sure they are aware of any uneven surfaces or obstacles in the ceremony space.
Ceremony Props and Accessories
If there are specific props or accessories used during the ceremony (unity candles, special readings), ensure they are present at the rehearsal.
This helps participants familiarize themselves with these elements.
Photographer and Videographer Involvement
If you've hired a photographer or videographer for your wedding, consider having them attend the rehearsal. This allows them to plan their shots and familiarize themselves with the venue.
Gratitude and Acknowledgment
Take a moment during the rehearsal to express your gratitude to everyone involved.
Acknowledge their time and effort, as it sets a positive tone for the wedding day.
Refreshments and Hydration
Provide light refreshments and water during the rehearsal, especially if it's a lengthy process. This ensures everyone stays focused and energized.
Essentially, most of these etiquette rules boil down to considering participants’ needs and being courteous. When you do that, you’ll help ensure a successful rehearsal and an unforgettable wedding ceremony.
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901 W 34th St, Houston, TX 77018
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