Have you ever imagined yourself in the following scenario? Your wedding officiant says, “If anyone objects to this union, speak now or forever hold your peace,” and someone actually speaks up.

Awkward!

While it's rare for someone to say “I object” at a wedding, it does happen occasionally. Here’s what you need to know about wedding objections and how to handle one with grace in the unlikely event it happens on your wedding day.

What is a Wedding Objection?

Wedding objections refer to when someone speaks up to oppose the marriage during the traditional “speak now or forever hold your peace” portion of the wedding ceremony.

Typically, the officiant will ask if anyone has a reason why the couple should not be legally wed. An objection occurs when someone speaks up after this question is asked.

Why Would Someone Object?

There are a few reasons why someone might speak up during a wedding ceremony:

-They have a legal reason: They believe one or both people are already married to someone else. This could happen if one partner had a previous marriage they never legally dissolved.

-They know of a serious reason the couple should not marry, such as the relationship being unethical or illegal in some way.

-They consider it a last-ditch effort to have a relationship with you. Maybe they harbor unrequited romantic feelings or jealousy and are acting on emotion rather than logic.

-They are intoxicated and causing a scene.

-As a prank or dare (not recommended!)

Do You Have to Include the Objection Question?

These days, the "If anyone objects" sentence is often omitted from wedding ceremonies. But you might find it's part of your ceremony script if you're a member of an Anglican or Episcopal church holding a religious ceremony. The statement comes from the Book of Common Prayer's marriage liturgy section.

If your denomination requires the "if anyone objects" statement, and you’re concerned about the possibility of someone answering, consider having a private legal marriage ahead of time, then excluding this portion of the script from your symbolic ceremony.

Of course, it's still possible (however unlikely) that someone will speak up without waiting for the officiant's cue.

Preventive Measures

If you’re worried someone may object during your wedding day, here are some measures you can take to help avoid it:

-Don’t invite anyone you think would intentionally ruin your day. Only share wedding details with trusted friends and family.

-Give potentially challenging guests a role in the wedding so they feel included and are less likely to object.

-If you think someone close to you harbors unresolved feelings, speak to them honestly ahead of time. They may need closure.

-Remind your wedding officiant they can ignore frivolous interruptions and continue with the ceremony.

-Consider hiring security to politely escort out any drunken or disorderly guests before the objection point.

What Happens If Someone Objects?

So can you still go forward with your wedding vows if anyone objects? Most likely. Generally, a wedding objection cannot legally halt the ceremony.

Your officiant can ignore it and continue with the wedding if they wish. That said, a legitimate legal objection, such as proof one partner is already married, may result in the wedding officiant pausing the ceremony to address it. But a casual objection without legal merit cannot stop the proceedings.

How Should You Respond?

Stay calm. Take a deep breath and try not to react in the moment. Look to your officiant to handle the situation and do not engage directly with the objecting party. The officiant may intervene and remove the person if necessary.

If the officiant pauses the ceremony, respectfully comply, but ask to reconvene privately after investigating the objection.

Above all, do not let an objection ruin your special day. Stay beside your partner and focus on your love and commitment. An objection says more about the person objecting than about you.

Overcoming the Awkwardness

If someone causes an awkward scene with an objection at your wedding, try to defuse tension with humor and grace. Laughter and lightness can help smooth over discomfort. Possible responses could include:

-"Duly noted. Now let's get to the good part!"

-"We appreciate your concern, but this train has already left the station!"

-"If you have any additional relationship advice, you can write us after the honeymoon."

"Thank you, next!" (A nod to Ariana Grande's hit breakup song.)"

-"Bless your heart, but we've got this covered." (This response is perfect for a Texas wedding, but say it with a smile to take the edge off.)

-"We'll be sure to keep that in mind at our 10-year vow renewal!"

-"We know you mean well, but today is about love, not objections."

The key is keeping it lighthearted rather than mean-spirited. A bit of humor can help diffuse the awkward tension and get things upbeat again. Just don't engage negatively or dramatically. A touch of comedy reminds everyone this is a joyful occasion.

If an objection occurs, we also encourage you to look to your wedding party, family, and community for reassurance and support. Focus on those there to celebrate your love, not the one person trying to undermine it.

Advice for Wedding Guests

If you attend a wedding where someone objects, please do not gasp, whisper, or stare. Remain silent and let the couple and officiant handle it gracefully.

Offer your emotional support through peaceful, loving energy rather than an audible reaction. Clap when the ceremony continues to restore a celebratory spirit. Most importantly, do not gossip or dwell on the objection later. Let the couple overcome the awkwardness privately.

Every marriage has challenges. An objection forces a couple to draw on their resilience and commitment from day one. With the right mindset and support system, an objection can actually strengthen your relationship. Focus on love, not the distraction. Your union will grow even deeper as you overcome trying moments hand-in-hand.

The Bell Tower on 34th in Houston, TX, is a wedding venue committed to helping couples realize their unique vision for their big day.

Our elegant venue, a short drive from Conroe, TX, is known for our supportive, knowledgable team members and beautiful, Old World setting.

Learn more about holding a wedding here.

The Bell Tower on 34th

901 W 34th St, Houston, TX 77018

(713) 868-2355